Bioagriculture: la porta dei gatti

Earlier today, eg sent me a link and suggested it was an idea I could use with the cats. It’s just a fabulous idea, and I am all for it. It seems a bit much work to completely rewrite the entire proposal, however, so for a start, just go here and insert cat wherever it says sheep.

Our situations are very similar. The sheepherders are keeping the hills of Abruzzo in traditional ways. The cats and I are keeping the hills of Umbria in traditional ways. The sheepherders are under financial pressure and need help. We are under financial pressure and could use help. Now it is true that they have many hundreds or perhaps thousands of sheep you can adopt, and I have a varying population of cats that number around seven give or take a litter, they also need more money because they are tending to a larger land mass than we are.

Our initiative, “Adopt a sheep and defend nature”, is meant to invert this serious trend, and propose naturalists, environmentalists, and gourmets, the distance adoption of a sheep, that in exchange of maintenance and rearing expenses, will yield its fruits (lambs, milk, cheese, ricotta, wool, manure) as well as protection of the portion of land it defends together with the rest of the flock. Stock farms taking part in the initiative guarantee their products, including biological products, with quality marks, and among other things offer agritourist accommodation. Therefore the person adopting the sheep will be able to stay at the chosen stock farm and periodically follow the farm activities: grazing, lambing, milking, sharing, and transhumance. All this in full respect of the animals’ needs and habits, as dictated by the regulations of biological production.

Besides the fact that neither I nor WordPress knows what transhumance means, and that I would be hard put to hire rooms out to all the adopters should they decide to come, I think we can do a bit better than they on some issues. It’s a bit obscure, but the upshot is they are going to sell the products of your sheep to anyone, not send it to you. I am not sure what most of you would do with a year’s worth of wool, milk, lambs, grazing and manure, anyway. I can promise you, on the other hand, that if you adopt a cat I will happily send you anything it produces in a year that I can find. I will make adopters a reservation with Alberta if they want to be near their adopted cat, or somewhere in town with 4 stars if they just want to swing by and pick up their cat’s year’s production.

The advantages of the initiative “Adopt a sheep and defend nature” to the user are the following: a saving of over 12% of the market value of the products obtained, products that are certainly genuine, the option of using products derived exclusively from the adopted sheep (at the discretion of the user), since the adoption is nominal apart from the cheese products that need the milk of a number of sheep, which would still be guaranteed by being reared following the same criteria.

So, it appears that you will be given a 12% discount when you buy your sheep’s products. The cats products will be yours absolutely free!

With an annual contribution of € 190,00 we will be able to count on a capital that will help us by anticipating the shelter and feeding expenses and encourage us in carrying on our activity.

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I assure you, that with the exception of Other Guy, who seems to rack up vet bills like E Taylor collected gems, your annual €190 contribution will make life much nicer for the cats and for Umbria. The photo above is where your cat hangs out and where you can meet your cat or shear your cat. The chaise longue on the left is wearing its cat cushion and is accompanied by its anti-cancer umbrella. The table under the gazebo is strewn with embroidered cloths the cats have mounded for lounging. Two sides of the cat habitat are edged with catnip, so you can convince your cat to nip and then try to climb the concrete telephone pole behind. There is ample space to romp with your cat or even get down with him or her and roll around the habitat’s terracing. I think that beats the sheep crib, even if we don’t have lambs.

Special concessions, discounts or promotions for all the events and shows related to pastoral life will be reserved to those who join: the shearing festival in April – May; the transhumance festival at the end of May – beginning of June; the guide to the flocks at the summer mountain pastures on foot or on horseback in mid June; guided excursions in high altitude pastures in July – September; thematic evenings on production, pastoral activity, and taste laboratories, according to a calendar that will be updated every six months.

If it seems really important, we can institute a shearing festival in the spring. The transhumance festival is a bit more difficult, but we will consult a bigger dictionary and see what we can do. All the cats but Gloria do love to go hiking, but they prefer lower ground, not the mountains, and a quarter to a third of a kilometer is as far as they go. We can, however, go that distance and back again any number of times. Thematic evenings are pretty much dedicated to food — theirs — but they share very cheerfully, even with the hedgehog. Tastings should be no problem at all.

We do not yet have a prepared contract to sign, but it will be our pleasure to email you one on request. After all, the cats don’t have numbers, but names. Other Guy, Bear, Gloria, Nonna, Tom, Mamma and Tilda. I’ve talked it over with them and they seem extremely eager to have new patrons and to get home visits!